It is said that you have approximately half a million words currently utilized in the English language. Most of us have a commanding using our native tongue as well as others less so. Regardless of how many words could, you have one thing in accordance which is to make ourselves understood to others.
Of the half a million words available, there exists one word which all of us use in spite of age, intelligence, background or class, and it’s a word which I believe is misunderstood by many, and that is certainly the word ‘but’.
In Neuro Linguistic Programming, this word has great credence, and rightly so. It will be the underlying answer why disagreements continue for a while following they should which is one of the most disempowering words that people can use whenever we speak of ourselves.
When used inside the middle of a sentence, the term ‘but’ negates all that came before it. For example “I know very well what you are saying to me but I think accountant los angeles options”. Although the speaker will probably be attempting to convey which they understand the other persons’ viewpoint, exactly what the recipient will hear is they are being disagreed with, but in addition, their point is irrelevant.
This is the answer why disagreements continue long afterwards they should. If one person feels which they are not being heard then it’s likely they will just keep repeating themselves so that they can make themselves understood.
In this instance, replacing the term ‘but’ with the term ‘and’ is incredibly useful. It removes any barriers of communication because doing so implies to your recipient that their point has become heard and digested and there exists also another opinion that is added for the mix. In NLP this is whats called The Agreement Frame.
More importantly, when employed in self talk or put on to ourselves, the saying ‘but’ can be quite disempowering. For example. “I desire to lose weight but I love my food “. If we recall that exactly what comes before the saying ‘but’ is negated, than the puts the many emphasis on the matter that this person loves their food, and that is certainly all they’re going to think about and also the thought of reducing your weight is placed lower down on their own list of priorities.
If we only change that sentence around then it reads “I love my food but I would like to lose weight” swings the balance towards the thought that reducing your weight is the greater priority therefore the chances of see your face achieving their goal of shedding weight is greatly increased.
The turmoil how the mis-using this word would bring, both internally and externally might be enormous. If you might be using this word within the wrong way internally, when talking to yourself, you could possibly experience feelings of inner conflict, unease, frustration which if left to exacerbate can cause anxiety issues, stress and even depression.
Understanding how this small yet very significant word impacts on our thinking can greatly raise your communication skills and connect you with a far more rewarding life regarding reaching your goals.
I am a practicing NLP Master Practitioner and hypnotherapist in Cranbrook, Kent and possess dealt with a huge array of issues and problems, for instance; depression, panic and anxiety issues, absence of confidence, severe blushing, weight-loss, quitting smoking, anger management, abuse from childhood, habits (including nail biting, drinking and drug use) and removing phobias.
Contrary to popular belief, therapy need not be painful and go on for months as well as years. NLP coupled with hypnotherapy is exceptionally able to eradicating a number of problems quickly.